Chapters

January 11, 2026

Chapter 58: Hold Me Close

Living with a degenerative autoimmune disease since age 21, the author has undergone six surgeries and is no stranger to pain or recovery, but an upcoming reverse shoulder replacement on January 26 feels different. Unlike previous hip surgeries—familiar territory—this operation will immobilize his dominant arm for six weeks, exposing how fragile independence can be, especially while living alone. Faced with uncertain post-op support, a long and painful recovery, months of physiotherapy, and unpredictable outcomes for range of motion, he confronts not just physical limits but emotional ones as well.

September 5, 2025

Chapter 57: OH...The Humanity

This chapter reflects on my 55th birthday visit to the World Press Photo exhibit in Montreal, where haunting images of famine, war, and homelessness underscored the vast suffering endured globally—in Gaza, Sudan, Ukraine, and beyond—contrasted with the comforts of Western life. Grappling with guilt over a $170 dinner, my wife and I question inequality, the futility of small gestures, and humanity’s failure to equitably share resources, while also drawing perspective from my own decades-long battle with chronic illness. Ultimately, I'm warning that crises born of war, famine, capitalism, and the looming disruption of AI all point toward a bleak, destabilized future unless humanity finds the will to change.

July 26, 2025

Chapter 56: The Gaza Famine is "man-made"

This week, after watching NewsNight with Abby Phillip on CNN, I was appalled by Scott Jennings’ deflections during a segment on Gaza, where he continued his shameless defence of Trump-era talking points even as Peter Beinart—an American Jewish intellectual—called out the U.S. and Israel for their complicity in the starvation of Palestinian civilians. Beinart’s courage to speak out, particularly through his new book Being Jewish After the Destruction of Gaza, was a stark contrast to Jennings’ hollow rhetoric. The situation is heartbreaking and enraging, especially when pundits like Jennings reduce it to political gamesmanship. It reminded me of Live Aid in 1985—flawed but driven by good intentions—and how the world came together to confront a famine. We need that kind of global unity and moral clarity again, only this time with proper oversight to ensure aid reaches those who need it. Gaza doesn’t need more spin—it needs food, justice, and a new Bob Geldof.

July 26, 2025

Chapter 55: Pourquoi?

En réaction à une fusillade terroriste survenue à Ottawa en 2014, cet essai réflexif explore la question « Pourquoi ?» face à la violence insensée, à la souffrance et à la tragédie. M'appuyant sur mon expérience personnelle de la maladie et de la perte, je propose que de tels événements découlent souvent d'un état humain inconscient, marqué par la déconnexion, l'ignorance et la folie. De la guerre et de la cruauté à la destruction environnementale et à la violence aveugle, les horreurs du monde défient toute explication logique. Pourtant, au milieu de l'obscurité, j'essaie de trouver l'espoir chez ceux qui vivent consciemment et avec compassion, en proposant que le véritable changement commence non pas par des actions radicales, mais par de petits gestes quotidiens de bonté et de sensibilisation, une personne à la fois.

July 26, 2025

Chapter 54: Why?

In response to a 2014 terror-related shooting in Ottawa, this reflective essay explores the question “Why?” in the face of senseless violence, suffering, and tragedy. Drawing on personal experience with illness and loss, I propose that such events often stem from an unconscious human state—one marked by disconnection, ignorance, and madness. From war and cruelty to environmental destruction and random violence, the horrors of the world defy logical explanation. Yet amid the darkness, I try to find hope in those who live consciously and compassionately, proposing that real change begins not with sweeping movements but through small, everyday acts of kindness and awareness, one person at a time.

June 24, 2025 • version française

Chapter 53: Deux mondes

Dans ce chapitre, je repense aux derniers jours déchirants de ma belle-mère, décédée ce dimanche après des années de souffrances causées par de multiples maladies. Malgré les soins hospitaliers, elle a enduré une douleur immense. Cette expérience a révélé le profond fossé entre le monde des maladies chroniques et le monde extérieur, où la vie continue sans tenir compte de ces souffrances. En établissant des parallèles avec mes propres problèmes de santé et mes pertes personnelles, je contemple la nature complexe de l'existence humaine : comment les moments d'amour, de chagrin, de joie et de désespoir se déroulent simultanément, souvent de manière invisible.

June 24, 2025 • English version

Chapter 52: Two Worlds

In this chapter, I reflect on the heartbreaking final days of my mother-in-law, who passed away this Sunday after years of suffering from multiple illnesses. Despite hospital care, she endured immense pain. The experience exposed the stark divide between the world of chronic disease and the outside world, where life continues unaware of such suffering. Drawing parallels to my own health struggles and personal losses, I contemplate the layered nature of human existence—how moments of love, grief, joy, and despair all unfold simultaneously, often unseen.

June 12, 2025

Chapter 51: One Survivor

In this reflective blog post, I share a deeply personal update, weaving together themes of illness, grief, survival, and the randomness of life. Amid supporting ill family members, moving apartments, and facing my own health scare, I grapple with the unpredictability of existence, heightened by the news of a tragic Air India plane crash with a single survivor. Questioning notions of divine intervention and fairness, the post underscores how arbitrary survival can be, and how privilege and health are often overlooked blessings. Drawing parallels between my own long battle with chronic illness and that of a friend with terminal cancer, I ultimately invite readers to consider what it means to live meaningfully, especially when so many never get that chance.

April 14, 2025

Chapter 50: Superman For Just One Day

In this post, I recount an unexpected outcome from a shoulder surgery intended to repair a presumed torn rotator cuff. Post-operative findings revealed no tear, underscoring the limitations of imaging. Due to a prior neck fusion, I opted for a nerve block with sedation, which resulted in temporary paralysis of the arm for over a day. This experience offered a profound, albeit brief, insight into the challenges faced by individuals with paralysis, deepening my empathy for disabled people. Reflecting on personal health struggles spanning decades—including multiple surgeries and chronic pain—I acknowledge the psychological toll of chronic illness and the resilience required to navigate such challenges. Despite these hardships, I express gratitude for the mobility I retain and a renewed appreciation for life's complexities.

March 26, 2025

Chapter 49: Social Media: An Invisible Illness

Social media has evolved into a double-edged sword—while it has revolutionized communication and business, it has also fueled misinformation, cyberbullying, and societal detachment. Platforms like X (formerly Twitter), Instagram, and TikTok, once created for networking and entertainment, have instead contributed to mental health struggles, particularly among younger generations. The rise of toxic online behaviours, obsession with self-image, and addiction to short-form content raises concerns about how future generations will function in the real world. Once intended to connect people, social media now resembles an invisible illness, silently shaping human interaction in ways that many never anticipated.

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